My Dream, My Future

 Sketching What's Ahead Of Me.

I have always visualized myself wearing a semi-formal outfit with a hard hat on, any boots that would match with my outfit, and a high-visibility clothing that glows and ensures others that I am on the site. How did I even get this visuality? It was too early for me to dream something this much— no, scratch that. It was too early for me to build a dream that I never thought I'd like this much.

How did I even build that dream when I come from a family of educators? All of my aunts and uncles work to educate; they nurture every seed planted on every seat occupied by every dreamers like me. They teach.

 

And then suddenly I was born. Someone who belongs to a family of teachers just dreamed of not being a teacher, but being an engineer. To picture it out, imagine a basket full of red apples then suddenly, a gardener puts a green one on the basket. The basket looks awful for someone like me who gets easily bothered when something just don't fit in somewhere.

Back to my dream. 

"Libre ang mangarap." is what teachers, specifically the elementary teachers, often say everytime they ask their students about things like dreams. Maybe the teachers think the students worry of the challenges or obtacles their dreams may give them or put them in. Maybe saying that line makes the teachers think that they ease the students' feelings so that they can say to the class how they see themselves in the future. 

Since then, the line became their favorite words, like a favorite lyrics on a song. How bittersweet it is; at first, the line eases the fear of dreaming too high, but as time passes by, the significance or the meaning of the line fades away. 

I once was a child who believed that way too; that dreaming doesn't cost any penny. But as I was being put in different society, my perspective changes slowly. 

Sa panahon ngayon, hindi na libre ang mangarap. 

Aanhin mo ang pangarap kung hindi mo naman matutupad? Aanhin mo ang mga imahinasyong naiisip mo kung may kapalit palang mga salaping magpapahirap sa buhay mo habang tinutupad ang mga imahinasyong iyon? 

Hindi na libre ang mangarap. 

Yes, that's right. That's how I see everything now. 

I can say that I still imagine myself building a school, or a resort, or just simply my house. I'd love to do that. But as the future approaches, I fear of the obstacles my parents and I would face while reaching for a dream.

In 10 or maybe 15 years, I see myself as someone who wears clean clothes. I see myself as someone who's respected and is respectful. I see myself as someone who works together with her colleagues. 

I'd build houses, schools, restaurants, resorts, and fix roads, and strengthen bridges. 

I'd also design and build my own house located on a not-so-busy town. 

I'd stay on my house with my friends who'd pay time to visit and have a catch up. 

I'd buy myself the things that I wanted using the money I'd saved up, or maybe my salaries. 

I'd be happy living as I had reached my dreams. 

I never actually wanted a grand life, or living on a mansion. I never dreamed of that. I simply just dreamed of achieving my dream job, which is to be a civil engineer, and live a peaceful life. I just want to have my salaries on my early age so that I can enjoy the price of my hardworks. 

But most of all, I see myself 5, 10, or 15 years from now living happily. 

I see myself laughing with my friends sitting on the seashore. 

I see myself fighting the struggles I face. 

I see myself crying because of heartbreaks, or because of failures. 

I see myself getting up stronger than before.

I see myself spending time with my family. 

I see myself going home to someone who I'd spend my life with.

I see myself going out with my high school friends.

I see myself— my soul, free. 

The "marga" right now would be so happy once she meets the future "marga" that she has been building. To the students out there who also busy themselves to reach their dreams, padayon. 

Reference/s:

Blogger:

https://www.blogger.com

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https://artofsmart.com.au/engineering/civil-engineer/

Macro, A. Getty Images. (n.d.) What Is Civil Engineering? Date Retrieved: April 22, 2024. Retrieved from:

https://www.thoughtco.com/what-is-civil-engineering-4582488

Turner, S. (January 6, 2024). Why Is It Called Civil Engineering. Date Retrieved: April 22, 2024. Retrieved from: 

https://storables.com/diy/planning-engineering/what-is-geomatics-in-civil-engineering/

(n.a.) (n.d.) We Make Buildings Easy. Arbor Homes. Date Retrieved: April 22, 2024. Retrieved from: 

https://yourarborhome.com/building-process